Dodging the Delivery

Ok, so it's way past my birthday and not yet time for our wedding anniversary, but MOH does not believe in celebrating "mere dates." He buys me presents as and when he feels like it, if he feels like it. But a present is a present and I'm not looking a gift horse in its mouth. So, according to his latest credit card statement I am the proud owner of a new Sony Cyber-shot DSC - T9 digicam. I'm itching to lay my hands on the sleek i-podish looking slim "steady shot." However, I have yet to even lay eyes on it.
The item was shipped last week, and I would've had it with me by now had it not been for my friendly neighborhood UPS guy/gal. To give the devil his [or her] due, this person did come by with my package last Friday. The tag on my door tells me that a delivery attempt was made at 11 a.m. or thereabouts on April 7th. So why do I have an issue with that?
Well, some poor souls [like me] have to work for our bread, you know. Even with prior intimation [that a package is about to arrive] we can't hang around the house all day waiting for the delivery person to ring the doorbell. Now this particular delivery person has been doing the rounds of my neighborhood for the last three years at the very least. After umpteen such leave-a-tag-at-her-doorstep-coz-Maggi-ain't-here episodes, one would imagine that she would make a note of it somewhere, and time her delivery attempt accordingly.
I spent all of Saturday and Sunday wondering whether the UPS guys operate on a by-rote formula. I even tried to envision the stream-of-consciousness monologues that went through the delivery person's mind when he/she was out delivering a package? Make first attempt between 9 a.m. and 12 noon. Make second attempt between noon and 5 p.m. Make third attempt after 5 p.m. Surely the darn folks will come home for dinner! If they don't, well, the idiots can make the drive their own car to the UPS office and pick up their stuff because there's no space on their dront door to leave any more tags. Does the delivery person feel a sense of triumph if/when people actually answer the front door and sign for a package at the very first attempt? They must then, muse, "Wow! Finally, a person who takes her packages seriously?!"
I've missed two attempts already. I actually let out class early today and made a beeline for my car hoping against hope that I'd make it home before the UPS gal did...there's no tag on my door, so I think I'll get my package today...unless, that is, she makes her stop when I am away picking up the brat from school. Sigh!